We ride the Ferris wheel every single day. That's why, I long for old days, for the simple life, I wish I have what I have now but back then if that makes sense. I won't bore you with more details, because we are still living Hamdillah, but you are not here. On higher note, am also managing a little dream of a business, oh no stop your joyful tears granny. Do you think this day will come? I hope so. Being the spirited person that I am I find it a struggle to cope of someone giving me orders. I drive every day to work, hoping its the last day I deal with a superior. Am sure you would loved him if you saw his big black eyes and button nose. Let me tell you how life changed: am a married lady now! Yes that's right! And even better, I have a son, his name is Mohamad, a complete ball of joy. There will be no days where you stay awake all night waiting for us to reach home, or have those very traditional breakfasts, you were lovingly forcing us to drink saffron milk, it tasted good when I think about it now. When I grew up, I realized your departure was eternal. I was little, did not know what it meant. I had learned a lot from the past two months than I have ever learned in my whole life time. I recovered yesterday, but am clueless about tomorrow.
I talk now, because am aware of now, am better now. It even left me thinking how god has a reason in all your life encounters! They lift me up, they stood by mentally, emotionally and physically. And could I have ever done it without my circle of sunshine, friends that ironically been through cancer with loved ones before. That was how much the shock moved my core.įor god's miracles, all of this was showing as a strong well Infront of her innocence toward this stupid sickness. So me finding out this information literally recked my world, it split my head, I felt my heart was displaced. I myself was a younger version of her soul. A person I will have to call every single day just to chat and laugh. And for those who know my mother, she is not just a mother, she is a true best friend, and I don't mean it in a cheesy way, no she is really my best friend. Spring of 2015, 2 weeks my celebrating my 28th birthday, mom was diagnosed with Cancer already at late stages. they are waste of my energy and my thoughts. For it showed me the true colors of what is worth your time.Īfter being a crying baby for years and years, I find myself thinking three times before drifting a tear. And I am very grateful that I went through it early in my life. I love what I have gained from this experience. return it back and type this.įast forwarding my life to today.
I stop typing for a second, take a sip of that tea. I needed to swallow what came my way rushing me to start living again. I still do not know what happened to me.īut I needed solitude. I just left, sent a msg while I was about to buckle my plane seat belt and switched off my phone. When I left, I did not want to say goodbye to anyway. We familiarized ourselves with the surrounding, a doorman, a Starbucks right around the corner, A UPS Store for my quick runs to print things for my floweshop, and a line up of grocery stores with all sort of Kales I could remember names for. We quickly blended in that neighborhood as if we lived their our whole life. A year ago, we packed both of us and flew to a 2 bedroom apartment in Upper West Side. She is still in NYC a city I have always loved and admired, and secretly wished I could live in my teen years.
I am two week away from packing my suite cases and flying to my home, a place that is far from home, but holds the person who will always hold me to the ground, mom. When Francis Underwood utters his senctences: the worst thing about common sense is that its common. I can hear him watching House of Cards season 4 in the background. Hubby poured me Green tea, my ideas started coming to me as I watched the steam coming off the mug and relaxed in front of my screen.
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